Casefiles: The Greatest Race on Earth!

You know it is a crazy world when you pay a discounted price of S$44.00 for a singlet, 2 ugly bags (you will only use them once in your life), countless brochures and advertisement flyers, a measly satchet of muscle rub (for muscles you never knew existed), and just to seal the deal, a packet of uncooked spaghetti noodle that you can get from the supermarket at $1.60.

Oh, did I mention that you are also paying to drag your sleepy self out of bed at 4 in the morning (a great song by gwen stefani, btw) on the 2nd of December, to congregate outside the Esplanade in the wee hours of the morning with 31,000 like-minded lunatics? No, the Great Singapore Sale is over. No, it's not a durian party. And NO, Zoukout is next week, mush-for-brains.

FYI, Zoukout is an annual all-night beach party where you fork out up to $58 to frolick in the Sentosa sand in your teeny-weeny bikini with like-minded lunatics, blasted by mind-blowing music all through the night, high on alchohol and low on cash (afterwards).

I'm talking about the Standard Chartered Marathon. This year's theme: The Greatest Race on Earth 2007/08 - Race For a Living Planet! *cheesy powerpoint trumpet sound effect*

Oh, btw, what do the Standard Chartered Marathon and Zoukout have in common?

For starters, they require you to be awake in the wee hours of the morning. Second, they leave you physically and mentally drained. And last but more importantly, just so you know, these are activities you could do for free any other day of the year. No kidding.

Most people learn their lesson after their first experience. Not me, no. I'm a slow learner, I am. Just 365 days after the my last lesson in pain, which lasted a good 6 hours, here I am subjecting myself to it all over again.

42.195 kilometers of hell.

Why am I doing it?

Because I have nothing better to do on a Sunday morning? That's not the reason.

For the bananas? Now I love bananas, don't get me wrong, and I could just stand at the banana counter eating bananas all day long. But that's not the reason.

Neither is the free 100plus.

Is it because I've already paid $44? Well, partly.

For the Finisher's Tee? Nah. That's probably less than a dollar in production costs.

I'll tell you why I'm doing it. For the chance to break my existing record, that's why! After all, there's a good chance I'd hit a WHOPPING 7 HOURS this time round!

The only thing that bugs me is that I'm running for 7 hours straight only to end up back at square one. I start at the Padang and end at the Padang. I'm not going anywhere, and neither are 31,000 other people. It's like they are using their weekends' off from the rat-race to join another rat-race. Both don't get them nowhere. Disturbing.

Not to mention that I have to cab back home after. Sure, you may own a car, but your feet will be so beat that you will end up crashing due to cramps. After all that running, I return to the Starting Point cunningly renamed "The Finishing Line". I might as well jog all the way home. At least that way, I AM going somewhere. Bah.

And I haven't been training, neither. So, this may very well be my last post, dear readers.

Cheerio!


For more information on The Greatest Scam- I beg your pardon - The Greatest Race on Earth, please visit http://www.thegreatestrace.com/